[verse 1: jawill]
Reminiscin', was too good that i was smitten
We can see that i am different from niggas that she kickin' with
Since a little kid, my confidence been dwindlin'
So she help me escape the mental prison i am livin' in
But for how long, she strung me along
It ain't no help that last week, that girl laughed at my song
Been on this flow since i was ten, my notes and my pen
Become my only friend when i'm alone in my head
Stay up for hours, and stare at the mirror
With tears in my eyes, man, i wish my sight was clearer
When the fear of failure that's in my heart grow bigger
A feelin' i don't say to my parents or my niggas
So i talk to dot and cole, they the only ones that know
That lately i don't sleep 'cause i'm layin' on my lows
Hate sleepin' in my bed, sleepin' in this apartment
Lay down on the floor, tears fillin' up the carpets, said
[chorus: orion león]
No place to me that feels like home
I run from things i can't, i know
Can you hear me now through the sounds of the rain, here's the fireworks
Every way, starin' heavyweight, keep the fire burnin'
'til i go feed myself
Can you hear the noise of the pain that you bury every night you turn?
Copin' means copin' everything, keep the fire burnin'
'til i go feed myself
[verse 2: jawill]
Reminscin', thinkin' 'bout all them texts
I ignored because i was stressed that the more that you were invested
The more that i'd let you down, you would see i wear a mask
And see the same kid, just drownin' in broken glass
In school, isolated, times i wasted starin' at the hopeless
Was erased by nights and days i stayed faded, paper soakin'
These waters very deep, more farther than you can see
I flow this side of this pond, don't bother, don't talk to me
Only rise when the sun fall, hungry, my chest is burnt through
Hope no one i love calls, can't see what i have turned to
A shell that walks around, too hollow, i fall, i break
Can't borrow no hope, i pray tomorrow don't show his face
Today's not even important, i stay awake 'til the mornin'
And go to sleep around twelve, the sun hates that i avoid it
But what's the use of bright lights if all i wear is shades?
And what's the use of beds if the floor is where i lay, i say if
[chorus: orion león]
No place to me that feels like home
I run from things i can't, i know
Can you hear me now through the sounds of the rain, here's the fireworks
Every way, starin' heavyweight, keep the fire burnin'
'til i go feed myself
[verse 3: jawill]
I carried every single fear in a bag on some wheels
I was scared if they clear, you wouldn't know what to feel
See a coward, just a monster, just like every other man
Lack of power, lack of honor that he'll never understand
I scream louder than i could on the nights i fear silence
Ain't doubt that i was good when i told 'em i was lyin', i was failin'
As a teen, i hid often, in college, i was fallin'
Mix the darkness with some weed, i'm cross unbothered
Man, i swear, if i could fly away without a trace
I think i'd circle back with the hope to see your face
And hope you don't remember me, memory of mistakes
And regrets that i just ran into the booth to save face
Lay waste to my shame, it ain't worth the large weight
Of the pain that i caused from my own heartbreaks
Suitcase just cuffed to my arms
I walk until the wheels fall off, then carry it in my palms
Maybe one day, i can give my folks a real smile
Maybe one day, i can do somethin' to make you proud
Maybe one day, after all this walkin' in the miles
I will open up this case, lay down and stay a while, stay a while