Peter Griffin - Mister Booze

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Peter: mr booze Audience: mr booze Peter: mr booze Mr b double o z e Brian & bruce: that sure spells booze Peter: you will wind up wearing tattered shoes, if you mess with mr. booze Brian & bruce: don't mess with mr. booze Audience: don't mess with mr. booze Peter: don't mess with mr. b-double o-z-e If you been so stiff they thought you died You'll feel better once you've testified Audience: testify Bruce: oh yeah! Audience: testify Audience: testify Bruce: i wanna testify, i wanna testify! Peter: well then cleanse yourself my son, cleanse yourself! Bruce: one time i took a library book out and i fells asleep reading it and i left it under the bed. i forgot about it for three and a half years. i was gonna take it back on amnesty day, but on amnesty day i had a sip of rosé wine and i never made it out of the house Peter: who's to blame? Audience: who's to blame? Peter: what's his name? Audience: we know his name, his name is Mr. booze Mr. booze Mr. b-double o-z-e don't ever choose Any game you play with him, you'll lose, so don't mess with mr. booze! Peter: if your head feels like it's two miles wide Audience: two miles wide! Peter: you'll feel better once you've testified Audience: testified Brian: oh yeah Audience: testify Carl: i wanna testify, i wanna testify! Peter: well come forward dear brother and testify! Carl: i used to be a soda pop guy. then i switched to the bottle. now i don't leave my couch and i've seen every movie ever. you name a movie, i've seen it Audience: meet dave Carl: seen it Audience: the eiger sanction Carl: seen it Audience: donovan's reef Carl: seen it Audience: license to drive! Carl: definitely seen it Peter, bruce & brian: that's a shame Audience: what a shame Peter, bruce & brian: who's to blame Audience: for corey haim? His name is Mr. booze Mr. booze Mr. b-double o-z-e you must refuse You'll make the obituary news If you mess with mr. booze If you've been so stiff they'd thought you died You'll feel better once you've testified Testify Testify Tom tucker: this man wants to testify Peter: very well my brother Let us lead him on the path of righteousness Tom: this poor gentleman used to speak in long, eloquent sentences. but after years of drinking he can only speak in short, choppy utterances Why, at one time, if you asked him who his favorite musicians were he'd say leonard bernstein, johann sebastian bach and wolfgang amadeus mozart. but thanks to that old devil hooch, it's all changed Who's your favorite musician, ollie? Ollie williams: cher! Tom: he doesn't even like cher Brian: now alcohol makes a big man small And can lead to a life of crime Audience: yeah! Bruce: demon rum makes a gent a bum And cash in before your time Audience: yeah! Dr. hartman: bootleg gin puts you in a spin Till you don't even know your name Audience: yeah! Peter: you're a basket case flat on your face And there's only one guy to blame Audience: mr. b-double o-z-e Mr. booze Mr. booze Mr. b-double o-z-e don't ever choose Peter: you will wind up wearing tattered shoes If you mess with mr. booze Audience: don't mess with mr. booze Peter: oh mr. booze Audience: don't mess with mr. booze Peter: oh mr. booze Audience: don't mess with mr. booze Brian: don't mess with b-double o-z-e 'cause that spells booze And your gonna lose with mr. booze Audience: oh, yeah! Brian: don't mess around with mr. booze Audience: don't mess with mr. booze Bruce: that's what he said now Audience: don't mess with mr. booze Peter: oh mr. booze Audience: don't mess with mr. booze Don't mess with mr. ... Don't mess with mr. ... Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh Don't mess with ah-ah Oh mr. booze Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh Yeah!
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